Thursday, January 19, 2006

[Cricket] The Match Referee - No Fun Here

In a recent interview with Fox Sports, some old fella, an ex test cricket umpire of the 1970’s said that Ricky Ponting was a disgraceful captain and that the recent crop of Australian cricketers should be branded the ‘Ugly Aussies” =>.

Yes, so far this season three of the Aussies, Glenn McGrath (Bad Language-Dissent), Brett Lee (Dissent), and Adam Gilchrist (Dissent), have been hauled in front of the match referee, to face charges of disrupting the game or committing some crime that is not in the spirit of the game. The match referee is there to punish players for bringing the game into disrepute. This institution is, as far as I know, pretty unique to cricket. I mean if they fined every rugby player who ever swore during a game, if they suspended every rugby player, or worse every football (I hate using soccer) player who argued with a refereeing decision, they wouldn’t have anybody playing the game. But often the damage has been done in cricket and the players are punished after the fact. Can something be done on the field at the time to penalise cricketers? In rugby if someone does get a bit lippy, BANG, a penalty, 10 metres extra, perhaps a spell in the sin bin. Could the sin bin be used in cricket? Here are some ideas I have for in-game penalties for stroppy cricketers.

For Bowlers

  • A bowler must bowl one over with his/her opposite arm
  • A bowler must run in for each delivery from the boundary for an over (particularly nasty for Spin bowlers - See Warnie Run)
  • A bowler must do his/her own fielding off each bowl for an over, while his team mates watch from their fielding positions
  • Two wickets of the batsmen’s choice are removed from both ends for one over
  • A bowler must bowl gentle full-tosses at the batsmen and then must go up and personally congratulate the batsman should he be smashed for a four or a six

For Batsmen

  • Bat length is shortened to one third of the original length
  • The ‘meat’ of the bat is cut out, leaving a large hole
  • Two extra wickets are inserted at either end
  • The popping crease at either end is shortened to six inches
  • While running between the wickets, batsmen must meet in the middle, link arms and dance around their bats in a highland fling

For Wicketkeepers/Fielders

  • Fielders must face away from the batsmen until they hear the ball hit the bat
  • Wicketkeepers must take off their gloves for one over of pace bowling
  • Fielders in the deep must throw the ball back with their opposite arm
  • For wicketkeepers, the popping crease at both ends is lengthened by 1 metre
  • No speaking by the wicketkeeper and the fielders is allowed for 5 overs
  • Fielders must attempt to take catches in their mouths or perhaps with their feet

3 Comments:

At 5:45 PM, Blogger Hadyn said...

Batsmen must remove all padding except their helmet and box for one over of pace bowling.

To penalise the batsman, fielders are allowed to enforce the one-hand one-bounce rule for one over.

The bowler must hold the umpire's jersey while he bowls an over in your place (but he still officiates).

The batsmen must wear the "parachute of shame" which will slow their running between wickets.

If two players are sanctioned at the same time they must mouth kiss each other. With toungues. Slowly. Although this become open to abuse.

 
At 8:00 PM, Anonymous Mike said...

Excellent post Dom - if only all cricketing discussion was as considered. And good suggestions, Hadyn. Although not so sure about that last one. You might find some players would actively collude to incur this penalty.

 
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